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        <title>931Blog</title>
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        <link>http://www.myclarksvilleonline.com/pages/inkspot/</link>
        <lastBuildDate>Fri, 10 Feb 2012 14:48:03 +0100</lastBuildDate>
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            <title>Video Game Addiction May Be a Growing Problem</title>
            <link>http://www.myclarksvilleonline.com/pages/inkspot/op/extended/article/5</link>
            <description><![CDATA[According to a recent survey of nearly 1,200 American youths between the ages of eight and 18, nearly one in 10 children who play video games may be developing an addiction to the activity.

According to researchers, about 8.5 percent of video game players exhibited &quot;pathological patterns of play,&quot; a designation reserved for gamers who displayed at least six of 11 clinical symptoms showing damage to family, social, school, or psychological functioning. The most typical symptom was skipping household chores in order to play video games, but many of those surveyed also said they played to escape problems and took time away from homework and school studies to play.]]></description>
            <pubDate>Wed, 22 Apr 2009 19:14:49 +0100</pubDate>
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            <title>Black Mothers Matter, Too</title>
            <link>http://www.myclarksvilleonline.com/pages/inkspot/op/extended/article/4</link>
            <description><![CDATA[I have a gripe. There's a dominant mommy culture in this country and its face is mostly White and affluent.


That bothers me because Black mothers have important perspectives, unique insights and many of the same across-the-board issues as all moms. But we are often overlooked in all the great mommy debates. We aren't seen as the thinkers in this Mommy Movement; not respected as an important perspective in shaping the future of, say, maternity leave and childcare issues; nor our journey in motherhood told in cutesy books or network sitcoms.

My fear is that there's some dangerous subliminal messaging here; namely, my job as a Black mother is simple: make sure my children don't become future criminals, gangsta rappers, dog-fighters, teenage mothers or welfare recipients. Our hands are full; let's leave the policy-making and big picture idea-shaping to someone else.

But more strikingly, I fear that Black women are still viewed as breeders, not nurturing mothers; women who &quot;end up&quot; mothers and not those who choose and embrace the path of motherhood. Hey, we're too busy rolling our necks, cussin' or smacking up our kids to take part in esoteric conversations about enacting meaningful legislation that supports mothers.

The last bit of blame falls on us. We have to speak up. We, too, want the best for our children, which includes having better maternity leave options and flex-time schedules that aren't career killers. 

The truth is, we are intentional parents with supportive husbands and our relationships are not just baby mama drama. We can learn a little something from our Caucasian sisters here--if they have an issue they will create a community, live or online, in a minute. They will speak up, march or start a foundation and they will be heard. 

We can start by viewing our voice as important and demanding to be heard. We can start by rallying together. The world is officially on notice.

]]></description>
            <pubDate>Tue, 21 Apr 2009 20:43:41 +0100</pubDate>
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            <title>Spare The Rod… Or Beat The Child Into Submission?!?</title>
            <link>http://www.myclarksvilleonline.com/pages/inkspot/op/extended/article/3</link>
            <description><![CDATA[We all know the first part of the bible verse, Proverbs 13:24.  Â“He who spares the rod hates his son,Â…Â”
But do we pay any attention to the other half?
Â“Â…but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.Â”

Submitted by &quot; BIG DADDY&quot;

My son just passed that magical age of 20 months, which for all intents and purposes means heÂ’s in the throes of early onset Terrible Twos. Everything in the house is fair game to get chewed on, thrown under the couch, or doused with apple juice. Remote controls mysteriously go missing for days on end. Food is tossed. Food is intentionally regurgitated. Food reappears in mysterious places. And of course, as first time parents, we eat all this up and happily snap pictures to embarrass him with someday.

That said, there are those (increasingly more frequent) times when the young fellaÂ’s natural enthusiasm and wonderment with his growing awareness of the world grates on your next-to-last nerve. He climbs on things he shouldnÂ’t. He doesnÂ’t fall asleep when he should. He pretends not to hear you, even when youÂ’ve called him for the umpteenth time. And this is when we as parents are faced with a common dilemma: To Spank, Or Not To Spank.

That is the question, and IÂ’ll freely admit I donÂ’t always have the answers.

Old-school parents will tell you youÂ’ve gotta pull out a switch every now and then to keep order in the house. ThatÂ’s how my parents, and most of the other parents in the Southern neighborhood I grew up in did it, at least. Generally, Mom was the day-to-day, multipurpose disciplinarian. SheÂ’d bark out orders, dole out punishments, and occasionally fry some legs if the situation warranted. But when things were really severe, she called in the Big Gun, aka: Daddy. After a long day at work, the last thing my Pops wanted was to have to lay hands on some unruly kids. Thankfully, this only happened a handful of times, but I remember them so well today that my butt still stings. The combination of both parents (as well as grandparents) and their contrasting styles of ass-whoppinÂ’ worked. My two brothers and I, by all accounts, turned out just fine.

But like most other remnants of the past that we tend to over-romanticize, I donÂ’t know if this brand of discipline is best suited for todayÂ’s climate and todayÂ’s kids. What used to constitute normal discipline would probably warrant a visit from CPS nowadays. Whites are often criticized for such laissez-faire tactics as Â“timeoutsÂ”. Many will argue that this approach leads to kids who donÂ’t respect parental authority, talk extra greasy to their Moms in the grocery store, and eventually go on to become serial killers. Then again, the Â“switches and stensionÂ’ cordsÂ” model of black discipline ainÂ’t exactly perfect either, as evidenced by the 8,000 or so black people who die, primarily at the hands of other blacks each year. You could argue that this suppression of anger, as opposed to giving an explanation of what was done wrong and an appropriate punishment, is somewhere at the root of this violence.

Before I was married and had my own kid, I pretty much agreed with the whole Â“spare the rodÂ” bit. If it worked for me and my brothers, why would I do anything different with my own child? But like many other things that come with having your own family, IÂ’ve since become really familiar with the phrase Â“never say neverÂ”.

My wife and I use various tactics to keep our child in line, including punishment by loss of privileges, raising our voices in instruction (not anger), and yes, even the much picked-on Â“timeoutsÂ”, which surprise, actually do work. Do we sometimes have to call in the Big Gun and Â“fry some legsÂ”? Yes, but this is always a last resort, and for that matter, hardly a regular occurrence.

Only time will tell whether our method of discipline Â“worksÂ” by whatever terms you choose to define that word. But since weÂ’re talking, I figure IÂ’ll ask you guys.

Question: What forms of discipline do you typically employ to keep your children in line? What sorts of things will you not do? Have you found that certain types of discipline do not work? 

]]></description>
            <pubDate>Sat, 26 Apr 2008 21:08:16 +0100</pubDate>
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        <item>
            <title>Couples in Relationships</title>
            <link>http://www.myclarksvilleonline.com/pages/inkspot/op/extended/article/2</link>
            <description><![CDATA[I saw this list on msn, check it out and let us know what you think. IÂ’m already not sure if number 3 is possible or not, mars vs. venus and IÂ’m curious to see what everyone says about number 5.



1. Take responsibility for the good and the bad. If you screwed up and you know it, face up to it. DOnÂ’t try to point the finger the other way and make it someone elseÂ’s fault.

2. Operate in hope. Believe the good will overcome the bad, donÂ’t focus on the imperfections. Praise the changes you see, no matter how small.

3. Understand the opposite sex. Dwell with each other according to knowledge. Learn how to help him/her get from point A to point B. You know your spouse better than anyone, understand all their feelings before reacting to their moods.

4. Walk in forgiveness. Bring healing to the hurt that may have been undeserved. Marriage is a union of two good forgivers.

5. Understand that love is a commitment, not a feeling. Feelings come and go, fade away. Love is a commitment to the person you married and should be treated as such. Feelings towards that person might change but if you work on the commitment the feelings for that person come back.

]]></description>
            <pubDate>Sat, 26 Apr 2008 18:04:43 +0100</pubDate>
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        <item>
            <title>931Blogger</title>
            <link>http://www.myclarksvilleonline.com/pages/inkspot/op/extended/article/1</link>
            <description><![CDATA[Backyard Parasites
submitted by Ron Dayley and Kathryn Norbeck

There has been a lot of noise lately about backyard fighting. As many of you may know mixed martial arts (MMA) is currently illegal in TN. However, schools such as SSF Submission Academy, Nashville Mixed Martial Arts, Nemesis and many other academies throughout the state have been working hard to legalize the sport. MMA is a combination of wrestling, Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, Muay Thai, and Western Boxing. And, one of the fastest growing sports in the nation as witnessed by the exponential growth of events such as the UFC, Bodog, IFL and King of the Cage. It can be found on TV on numerous channels just about any night of the week. Yet, there are large groups of people out there who call themselves fans who hurt the growth of the sport everyday by participating in or watching backyard fights. Lets be clear about what backyard fighting is; a group of a school kids and/or adults with no MMA training. 
Every time people throw backyard fights it hurts the efforts at legalization. Parents find out about it and complain to their state representatives or call the local police. Not to mention that someone could with little to no training fight if he or she chooses to and risk serious injury. Anyone can do a quick search on YouTube and find numerous videos of backyard fighting; many of them ending in serious injury. They are unsanctioned, unregulated, and have no medical support for the participants (typically children, under the age of 18) on hand. The types of people that organize these kinds of events are parasites who care not about the fighters but rather about being the center of attention as the Â“matchmaker.Â” 
]]></description>
            <pubDate>Fri, 15 Feb 2008 18:14:04 +0100</pubDate>
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